I haven't seen anything like this in fifteen years.

Yesterday I went to the eye doctor. Now I guess I should give you a little back story before I go into what happened. I have very very bad vision. I started wearing glasses when I was in the first grade. I have worn contacts since about the sixth grade. If I am being honest, I would say that I don't really take care of my eyes. I sleep in my contacts, I wear them longer than I am supposed to, I do all the things they tell you not to.

About three weeks ago I went to an eye doctor at a store. I planned to get an exam and order contacts after months of avoiding it. My eyes had been itchy and watery and I mentioned this to the doctor. After examining my eyes she says that I have corneal abrasions on both of my eyes from sleeping in contacts. I had to stop wearing contacts for five days and use antibiotic drops. I did just as she said. I took off three days from work (even though she refused to write me a note) and dutifully dropped my eyes.

Last week my eyes started to itch again. I thought that my eyes were still scratched so I went to see my family doctor who then sent me to an opthemologist. This is the doctor that I saw yesterday. Although this doctor did reprimand me for my poor eye care, she was very nice. we talked about my symptoms and what the other doctor had told me. Then she looked at my eyes.

It is never good when your doctor says "Oh my god! I haven't seen anything like this in fifteen years!" That's right. I have apparently caused a condition in my eyes that will make it difficult for me to wear contacts in the future. Nice. Because of my laziness when it comes to my eyes I now have large bumps inside my eyelids. Isn't that disgusting?

Now I can't wear my contacts at all for two months, which means I will have to buy glasses. which also means that I wasted $90.00 on the first eye doctor who gave me the wrong diagnosis. For mow I have been wearing my glasses from high school. I can't really see very well out of them so all day I have felt like I am in a dream. I can't wait until I can see again.

Friday

I have officially begun my garden!! When I woke up this morning to check on my little plant friends, I saw beautiful little shoots! am so happy. The catnip, basil and red poppies have all sprouted. Here are the first pictures.

I came home for lunch this afternoon to discover one tray of flowers destroyed by the cat. The were sitting on top of the fridge when I left this morning but when I got home they were all over the stove. There was dirt in the burners and all over the floor. My poor little seeds were a mess. I thought about taking a picture to post, but I thought better of it.

Job Opening

This has been the longest and strangest week and it's only Wednesday. This week I have already had one client lose his housing due to incompetent group home providers, two clients admitted to the hospital, one for refusing to eat or bathe for two months and one for threatening to kill her neighbor and one client (who's case I have trying to terminate for months) come out of drug treatment and cuss me out. It's not even a full moon! It must be the changing seasons. I wish it was Friday. I need a few days of rest and relaxation. I really hope that I will be able to start Grad School in the fall, I don't think my nerves can take much more of this.

How totally sweet is this?

Yesterday at work I began my union campaign. I talk to the first people who I thought would be pro union and willing to help me garner support from other workers. I can't believe how well it went. I only had mention the word union and they were on board! I am so pleasantly surprised about how open people were to the idea. I think that this is a good sign. Maybe my coworkers and I are on the same page and really ready to make some progress! I know that the hard work is still to come, though. I am sure that it will still be an uphill battle to the administration to recognize a union.

On the Brink

Like many other people in this country, I hate my job. I work as a case manager for the severely mentally ill. That basically means that I have a case load of fifty adults that I work with on a continuous basis. I help them with housing, medication, cleaning, food , clothing- pretty much anything they need. I spend most of my days rushing around for one crisis to another trying my best to fix as much as I can. It is depressing and frustrating, not to mention stressful. Due to the fact that most people don't really realise the importance of mental health or care about "crazy" people,my job is pretty terrible. Case managers can play a pivotal role in the life of a person with a mental illness. We are the first people who get called when a client threatens or attempts to hurt themselves or someone else. We are also the people who get blamed if something goes wrong with the client like they lose their housing or social security.

Unfortunately, case managers get little respect or encouragement and even less money. For this reason I have been secretly working to get a union started at my workplace. I have been planning my strategy along with a health care union rep for a little while now. Tomorrow I am bringing this plan to the forefront. I must admit that I am a little nervous. I am not really sure what is going to happen. The union has assured me that legally, I cannot get fired for such actions, but that I will most likely get intimidation for the administration. And possibly from my coworkers. I have been trying to keep my mind focused on how important this is and how much it could improve things for me and my clients and my coworkers. I am still scared though.

Sometimes I think I might be doing something truly amazing. Other times I think i may be in over my head. I guess I'll know for sure tomorrow.

Spring has not yet sprung

Even though today felt like winter again, I am still in the spring mindset. I can't stop daydreaming about my garden and how awesome it is going to be this year. I can't wait for my strawberries to arrive!! I need to find something else to occupy my time with until things start to sprout. I am constantly hovering around their containers hoping to catch a glimpse of a little green leaf. It has only been two days. I think I need to give it a rest for a while. I know that will never happen though. The thought of things growing gets me excited. It 's better than Christmas. I only wish I lived in a house with room for an outdoor garden. I keep planning my fantasy garden. (It is complete with trellis and ivy!) I can already see myself sitting outside with a book in the shade surrounded by plants. I can think of nothing more peaceful.

Gardeners Unite!!!

Today I started my first seedlings of the season. I am so excited. I love the spring. this year I am planting lavender, basil, catnip, strawberries, thyme, chives and sage. I have never grown fruit and so I hope this goes well. I want to make stawberry preserves but I am not sure how many plants I will need for that. I can't wait for real spring!